William A. Pride has perfect eyesight. He once parallel parked a train. He is rumored to be Santa’s Secret Santa. He lives vicariously through himself. When it is raining in Boston, it is because Will Pride is thinking of something sad. Cuba imports cigars from him. When he is in the field, mosquitos refuse to bite him purely out of respect. In museums, he is allowed to touch the art. Will is an engineer who hates writing bios about himself.